My (Not)Pet Chibi

Screaming herself hoarse, she came to us one warm April evening last year. Even after wolfing down the food we gave, she continued her yowls. She didn't look famished though a bit thin. No injuries, no matted fur. Whatever was she crying for? The humans who possibly abandoned her?

The kids in the building were excited. We had a tomcat called Milo who was similar to her in colouring. So they started calling her Milo's daughter (Milo was neutered). :) Maybe because another community cat, Choti, started stalking her, she moved to the vicinity of another building. Two rowdy dogs (who killed Choti's kittens) ruled that area, so we tried to bring her back. She persisted going back. We didn't know at that time that this grey-and-white kitten could stare those dogs down! They started changing their direction if they spotted her.

I don't remember who named her Chibi but that became her official name. I called her Trilly; after she stopped screaming, she started trilling when she saw me. She was also Slunky to me, because initially she didn't like to be touched and used to slink away if I tried. Others in her fan club might have had different names for her.

As we became more familiar, Chibi allowed touching and enjoyed being rubbed on her back. She used to lie down on her stomach with her butt towards me; a silent invitation to massage her. But she never enjoyed scratching under the chin or on her ears.

Without me realising it, Chibi became my motivation for evening walks and also noon walks! On spotting me, she would come running from per perch on the firehose cabinet or top of a car (Thar being her favourite). Or scare me by coming out directly in front of me from under a car. Following me on my walks (or sometimes running past to overtake me) became a pastime of hers. If I escaped from her sight (so that she didn't follow me to the territory of Mini, another feisty community cat), she would sit there looking in the direction I was walking, and come running when she saw me.

Not too much interested in food, she would eat just enough, not a single pellet more. So she could not be bribed with food to distract her from following me. After a few months, we started a new routine—spending some time in the park. She would go around exploring, stretching up and scratching the trees, occasionally climbing one, then as if to remind me that she hadn't forgotten me, would come chirping and rub against my legs. When mood struck, she would sit with me on the bench, relaxing a bit but always flicking her tail. Was she guarding me?

Dr. V, her main human (I was her entertainer), tried to get her neutered; she disappeared every time the ambulance came, only to reappear when they went away. But she didn't get pregnant at all, earning another name, man-hater (the cat equivalent of one)! Carrot came sniffing with his toxic masculinity; Chibi didn't give a damn. They had a few epic fights until Carrot got neutered and his hormones settled. Brutus came recently (another toxic one), followed by Marmalade with his soulful gentle pursuit. We planned to neuter her without delay.

Rain didn't deter her if she spotted me; it became my responsibility to take her to a dry place. But she didn't like stepping on wet grass, so we avoided the park in the monsoon.

Chibi once followed me to Mini's territory and spotted her; I carried her back to her area before Mini spotted her. (Chibi hated being picked up; she would squirm until she was put down. She had even bit me many times; such was her disapproval!)

Mini somehow came to know about Chibi's nearby existence and tried to expand her territory by stalking and fighting with Chibi. My two favourite cats, fighting with each other! For a time, my walks were spent separating the two furry bundles! To my immense relief, they seemed to call a truce, with Mini coming and doing a staring context once in a while.

If I had gone to Chibi after petting another cat, Chibi sniffed at my palm for long and curled her lips, as if to say "betrayal!"

Seeing Chibi and I together, a few people in our complex started talking to me, which would not have happened otherwise as I am a somewhat reticent person. Ms. S was in Chibi's fan club, and Chibi adopted her flat for sleepovers till Ms. S moved out. We bonded over Chibi. Mrs. S and I also became friends because of Chibi.

 

An accident (which I always worried about as she had the habit of razing past me to the middle of the road) took Chibi away from us. Since I was to go on a trip, I had spent the last few of her days sitting with her more than usual. On that fateful evening also, we sat together for half an hour or so in silence, I stroking her occasionally, before I fed her a bit and went home. That night, she didn't appear when Dr. V came for feeding.

When she didn't turn up for her morning feeding also, we got worried. She didn't come running when I made the calling sound. Because she had gone to sleep forever. Under a car. As if she had just lied down. No visible trauma. Camera footage showed she was hit by a vehicle after I left her.

In the 1.5 years Chibi was with us, she made me a better human being (not that I was bad earlier but there is always room for improvement) for her uninhibited love. I came to know and interact with more people because of her.

 

I grew up with a lot of cats and had lost many of them. But this was the first time I lost a cat as an adult. The grief was unexpected. Distressing! For several days, she monopolised my thoughts. When I walk in her territory, memories are everywhere; it tears me up! I will slowly get over it, but you will always be remembered with love, my darling girl!

I am thankful to the husband who hugged me tight when I came home bawling that day.  Grateful to Dr. V for arranging to give her a respectful burial; the staff who did the burial with care; the housekeeping staff who used to feed her during the day; the guards who kept an eye on her. My gratitude to the universe for being a part of Chibi's painfully short but cheerful life! And thanks to everyone for not saying, "It was just a cat."